i am still here…

i am here… lost but here.  with goals come set backs.  and although my plan was to write everyday and make art everyday… i have not.  i have been searching for inspiration and answers from everywhere from the internet (other artists, blogs, books, etc.) to doing a lot of soul searching within.  i have been down lately not being able to find my answers…

but tonight i was finally able to release some of my anger, thoughts, worries and it was freeing.  i see the world better when thing are in order and everything is balanced.  i know that is impossible to expect all of the time and i know that i need to carry on even when things are not all together but it gets hard.

this blog is a funny thing…. is it for me?  is it to entertain readers?  is it for me to share my truths in hopes of helping someone who feels the same way?  i’m not sure so while i am trying to figure that out i will just keep writing until it makes sense…

i search through my old posts… the numerous projects i have started and always fail to complete.  part of me wants to erase those posts because they are only proof of me not following through on something.  the other part of me wants them there because they are part of my journey.  i started this blog in hopes of finding inspiration and in return letting others join in on my journey.  so my journey, no matter how of track, crooked, wrong and incomplete is still MY journey.  and so what if there is proof that i am not perfect.  that’s ok.

plus, some of those old, incomplete project posts are filled with some really important memories and ideas.

am i rambling or am i making sense?  we will know soon enough.

looking to the future…

today is my last day of freedom before i return to the classroom/ work. i cleaned and organized all day trying it get all in order… and let my crazy controlling personality join me.

here is a before picture of my little one’s room/ my new art room. so much work to do!

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in more art news, i recommend going to a website. i written about lifebook . I loved this 2013 class! through this class i found effy wild and now i’m looking at more of her classes. because what i love more than anything is to learn! i did (purchased with a plan of doing) <em book of days last year so i am looking for more in 2014!

she wrote…

my creative venture today.. i put pen to paper.

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small task you may say, and really it was but i’ve been thinking and planning it forever. it’s what i do… i stress, plan, think, plan some more, talk myself out of, whine, make excuses… anything to not do whatever the task may be. why say this? well maybe if i admit this, if i put it out there (into the great unknown of the world wide web), then i will finally stop this self torture i partake in. beating myself over something so easily accomplished. i am my own worst enemy.

in more artsy (less negative energy) news, i did play online today. i played on numerous artists websites planning out and playing with all of the classes that i would love to take if time and money would allow.

currently i am signed up for the walk and am very excited about it starting later this month. the brave girls club is an amazing group of girls that do amazing things and inspire me on a daily basis. i suggest signing up for their newsletter a little bird told me. they do wonders for me, the people i tell about them and the facebook friends that just need to hear the message.

that’s all for tonight. i can share more classes and ideas tomorrow.

have a blessed, wonderfully artsy night.

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clean. relax… so i can create

have i made any art today? the answer would no. but if you asked me, i did something possibly more important… gave myself a little piece mind. i cleaned!

i know this sounds lame. and you’re probably like, why is she writing this on an ‘art & inspiration blog?’ well the answer this.. i’m going to be creating a little studio (“craft room” if you will) in my house! we have a three bedroom house and have two boys so I have up ‘my room’ when they came along. well it just so happened that they asked to share a room so I get my space back! so i’ll have pictures of it up as i make progress. nursery turns studio!

on the other side of the cleaning excitement, it felt so good to get things in order. as a creative person i often live in chaos or at least it feels like it. i guess that’s just the way my brain works. i like being organized but once i get busy and things get out of whack. you know those messy ‘artsy’ types.. gotta make a mess to make something beautiful happen. well i’m that person. and then after the mess i find myself not knowing where to start to fix it so it just eats away at me. am I being to honest here? well i got busy today. i spent all day cleaning their rooms, the game room (where my all of my sewing and fabric stash has been housed for the past two years!). so during this month i will be moving, organizing, painting and decorating our new spaces. at first i felt like i might be acting selfish but I really think this is going to be great for our entire family. the boys will have more room and an artsy mommy is a happy mommy. 🙂

so this was my day two of the year. not too bad if you ask me. i’m sore from cleaning and picking up all day but now i’m relaxing. drinking a nice glass of wine. and I think my creative activity of the day will be to journal a bit.

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new year. new plans. new…

i know i’ve said it a million times but i love starting a new year. i love the idea of a fresh start, a clean slate, a ‘do over.’ with a new year you get to improve on things you want to work on while learning from the past (that is now officially…last year).

so here i am, trying again to keep up with a blog.. to document my journey of inspiration… a search for my own creativity, inner self. a way to share some amazing finds either from myself or from other beautiful people that i find along my journey.

so this is my beginning. a start. a declaration that i will be better in 2014. i have so much to share and i’m starting here. a simple blog.. a way to share my journey.

here i go. 2014 holds so much hope!

here is my journey… you are invited!

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art every day. day 19

well again, all kinds of art and creative things happened in my life today but nothing specific that i created from scratch. a painting, drawing, etc. my little one was home sick, my hubby had work stuff, rehearsal, errands, etc…. needless to say, it’s past 11:30pm.. almost a new day, and time just got away from me.

although i will say i am encouraged by the new followers (welcome!!) and new likes so i keep blogging in hopes of accomplishing at least part of my original goal.

so today my creative things include a great rehearsal. in case you just joined i teacher theatre full time. middle school to be exact. i know what you’re thinking.. rough age. and you would be right.. but i don’t know that i would teach any other. anyhow, rehearsal was good. love working with my new asst and the kids to create such a great piece of art. it is why i do what i do.

next i got home and started working on my side business which is mostly pairing and embroidery projects. today was lots of sewing. tomorrow my son celebrates his birthday at school so he needed a special shirt to wake up to. 🙂

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next i filled an order for a group of triplets. love these pjs! they are going to be so cute on christmas!

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art every day. day 18

does dreaming count as creating?

I had ideas of art dancing around in my head all day… Oh the things i would make! but now that it is down to the hour I am blocked. unmotivated. undecided.

so this post isn’t exactly what i intended.. of course this challenge hasn’t been what i intended either but life is what it is. it is what you make of it and today i haven’t ‘made’ anything. but that is what tomorrow is for.. to do better, to accomplish more, to dream.

which brings me to my beginning statement. dreaming. i have been doing a lot of that. thinking of the future. my creative plans and dreams.

what will i do? what impact will i make on the world? what does the future hold?

but i guess that’s what life is all about.. the journey. the ride. the unknown.

here’s to tomorrow!

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art every day. day 17

i suppose i have altered the challenge a bit. i needed to focus on some household and school things today so instead of painting, drawing, etc. i read some pages from an inspirational book! i’ve had the book for a few years but as they say sometimes you just don’t get the message until you’re ready to receive it.

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i had forgotten how much i liked the book, what it had to offer and how much i needed it. Christine Mason Miller is one of my favorite artists. i’ve been following her work for a few years now and this book is great. it’s a collection of artists inspirations and exercises… a great gathering of the creative minds. i plan on diving back into it this week.

another item i plan to dive back into is my other ‘life book.’ i took a course through the brave girls club. the course was titled life restoration 2. it was an amazing course that was all about living the life you want to live. well i made my book but never continued to work on it, so it’s yet another thing to add to my ‘to-do’ list. but it is however a fun and necessary thing that should be there.

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